All parents are familiar with the Repetitive Pleases Synrome, it's built-in to every kid as part of their Pester Power. And boy...is it ever powerful!

We parents (I have two teenagers) like to pretend it doesn't have any effect, but deep down most of us want to grant our off-spring's every wish...up to a point. It's something to do with "I want to give my kids the opportunities I never had..." blah, blah, blah.

It's hard to understand unless you're a parent. So kids, I'm going to try and explain!

Let's say you want a pony REAL bad but your non-horsey parents are refusing to budge. Don't tell your parents I said this but it's not easy being on the pleading end and pretending you're absolutely, positively NOT going to give in. This is mostly because whatever is behind the Pester Power, you know it's going to cost you money.

We parents try to fob Pester Power off with "we'll see" or "I'll talk it over with your father/mother". This is a delaying tactic on our part and one we know is only going to work for a limited time.

Here's some reasons why your arguments just might not work!

"Horses are in my blood."
You and your husband/partner may have never been near a horse in your life, but your off-spring will ferret through your family trees and discover a great-great granny who used to ride six kilometres to school and back, bareback. Through snow and everything. They will argue that makes 60 kilometres a week g-g-granny rode (also sneakily showing that have been paying attention during maths), and that's where their love of horses must have come from.

"I'll pay for everything with my pocket money!"
...and the source of that is WHO? Bad argument, since your meagre income comes from your parents, which means they'll be the ones paying. Again.

"I promise to be really good."
Nope, heard that one before, like the pestering for the Xbox, the pestering for assorted games for the Xbox and the off the shoulder top and denim mini skirt your dad nearly went hairless over when he saw you in them.....

"I'll look after the pony all by myself."
Nuh-uh. Heard that one before too, like the puppy, kitten and assorted mice that stank. And who now walks the dog, cleans the cat's litter tray and did penance cleaning the mouse cage every couple of days until they accidentially-on-purpose escaped? Hands-up all you previously non-horsey mums and dads who now feed, rug, groom, tow floats, plait etc. etc. etc. Ah-HA, I THOUGHT so!

"You're just MEAN, you don't want me to have a pony!"
This one always hurts. Of course we'd love you to have a pony, it's just that after the dog, cat and mice.....

"I'll never ask for anything again!"
Nice try, especially if your parents have done their homework and discovered that horses need saddles, rugs and riders equipped with jodhpurs and all kinds of expensive, Australian-standard approved protective gear (which, incidentially, doesn't include off the shoulder tops and denim minis). And horses need shoeing every six weeks at $60+ a pop! Don't try this 'pester' when your mum is wearing daggy Kmart shoes that have seen better days. Or thongs in winter.

"Having my own pony will give me more responsibility."
Oooh, nice try but again, no go. Somehow parents just know some of those responsibilities will eventually be theirs...which means more lumped on top of the zillion they already have to struggle through each day (such as walking the dog......)

"I'll pay you back!"
Oh man, if I had 50 cents for every time my off-spring said that, I WOULD be paid back for everything ever!

"I promise I'll always keep my room clean!"
As if.

"If I don't get my own pony, I'll DIE!"
Probably not.

Alas, such is the force of Pester Power, many parents DO give in and buy their children expensive, responsibility-laden things like ponies. So what's the secret, the very best way for you to go about this?

Well I'd tell you but... ummm....I have to go wait for the blacksmith!

A. Horsey-Mum


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